Episode 40

It is a bright sunny afternoon. Everyone expected it to rain today but the sun broke through. There is a large crowd on Ahpla's campus. Everyone has gathered on the main yard because the buzz is that the Alphas and the AKA's are bringing their lines on for their annual yard show. Two students talk as they wait for something to kick off.

STUDENT - Yeah girl, I heard Presjina is on line. I aint seen her in two weeks!
STUDENT - Really? I didn't know that. She is real cool. Did you hear how many they have this year?
STUDENT - I don't know. I think they have more than two like last year though.

(The attention of the crowd quickly shifts toward Pearl library and everyone begins to run in that direction.)

STUDENT - Oooh girl, here they come!

(The AKA's are walking onto the yard. APRIL, OCTAVIA, SYLVIA, ASHANTE, GINA AND MAX are surrounding three ladies on line. IVY JUNE, IVY PRESJINA and IVY KATRICE.)
(The IVIES sing to the Old Negro Spiritual "This May be the Last Time" author unknown)

IVIES singing - This train don't carry no Deltas...
This train don't carry no Zetas...
This train don't carry no Rhos...
This train is only for the Sorors...only for the Sorors of AKA!
This train don't carry no Deltas...
This train...
(APRIL and OCTAVIA begin to form a path through the crowd to the AKA plot. The crowd is cheering loud for the ivies.)
STUDENT - Yeah June! Hook it up girl!
IVIES - ...This train is only for the Sorors...only for the Sorors of AKA!
(The IVIES stop and stare into the sky. The crowd cheers again. Many cameras are going off and a few are taping on camcorders. When the noise of the crowd diminishes, the pledgees begin.)
IVIES - Greetings Big Sister Dean Maxine! We humbly greet you in honor of...
IVY JUNE - The most revered!
IVY PRESJINA - The most respected!
IVY KATRICE - The most requested!
IVIES - Pink and green! You are the epitome of style and grace, a classy woman of nineteen oh eight!
(The IVIES greet to the tune of "Imperial" by Busta Rhymes and Rah Digga)
Big Sister you're phenomenal!
You know we love it when we see you everywhere we go!
All of our history yes we want to know!
So we kick it ivies here we go!
(The crowd cheers)
STUDENT - Do that shit PJ!
IVIES -A lovely lady of the first and the finest, you are the prettiest, the most supreme, you're every lady's dream!
We are ever so fortunate to bask in your presence!
Oh just to behold the Alpha Kappa Alpha essence!
One day, if we grow up, when we grow up if we ever get a clue, can we be, could we be just like you?
Although we now exemplify imperfection, we will continue this struggle with your direction!
You lead us and guide us in all that we do, so now we humbly ask how may we serve you?
APRIL - SkeeWeeeeee!
OCTAVIA - Skee Weeeeee! Hook it up spec, I see you June!
(MAX smiles, then looks serious again.)
IVIES - Greetings Madame Basileus, It is truly an honor to stand here before you.
Because these ivies truly adore you!
You are Lady AKA, always striving for the best!
You set the standard for all the rest!
A wonderful sight to behold!
Oh how we trust in you as we wait for the future to unfold!
For we know not what tomorrow brings,
but we can only hope that it is a sisterhood like yours, everlasting!
(IVIES bow their heads.)
IVIES - Oh Madame Basileus as we stand in your presence we hope we can express our great admiration and utmost respect!
(IVIES snap their heads back up quickly.)
IVIES - Could she be, the most beautiful girl in the world?
The epitome of Twenty Pearls!
Oh most sophisticated and stylish lady, of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority Incorporated.
Your style, your beauty, your elegance, and your class, makes us fall to our knees in envy!
You are queen of all divas, the lady supreme, of your grace we can only dream!
We are delighted to meet thee and greet thee!
SYLVIA & APRIL - SkeeWee!
(MAX looks at SYLVIA and smiles.)
STUDENT - Damn man, I'm glad I go to Ahpla. Other schools can't do this shit!
STUDENT - I know that's right!
IVIES - Greetings Big Sister Quiet Storm!
The most revered, our beautiful black queen!
You are the finest we have ever seen!
As you enter the room we notice the mood!
Its nothing but pure AKAtude!
We gotta face reality this road is certainly rough!
How could we deny we're only flesh and blood!
We gotta face reality with you to lead the way!
We can only hope and long for AKA!
OCTAVIA - Yeah Ashante!
ASHANTE - Thank you ladies!
(OCTAVIA stands up from sitting on the ground to hear her greeting.)
OCTAVIA - Don't mess mine up!
(The crowd laughs.)
RONNIE - I hear ya Octavia, pledge 'em girl! Roooof Rooooof!
(The crowd laughs again.)
IVY KATRICE - Introducing!
IVIES - Boom! Boom! Boom!
IVY KATRICE - Big Sister N.A.A.C.P.
IVY JUNE - The National Association for the Assassination of Chilling Pledgees!
(The crowd roars and starts cheering! Octavia smiles!)
APRIL - SkeeeeeeeWeeeeee Sands!
IVIES whispering - The Ivies are gonna make her unleash the paddle...
We don't really wanna make her unleash the paddle...
The Ivies are gonna make her unleash the paddle...
We don't really wanna make her unleash the paddle...
Ivies if ya hear us say yeah...Yeah!
Big Sisters if ya hear us say yeah!
OCTAVIA - Yaay yaay!
IVIES - So what's the paddle?
Uh huh what's the paddle?
It's the wood that's good for the sisterhood!
It's the wood that's good for the sisterhood!
(The IVIES greet to the tune of "The Thong Song" by Sisqo.)
She don't take no junk, junk, junk!
Gets guys like what, what, what!
At a set she gets crunk, crunk, crunk!
Think we'll sing it again!
Well she pledged real hard, hard, hard!
Gets props on the yard, yard, yard!
All day long...so we sing this song!
Greetings Big Sister N. Double A. C. P.!
(The crowd cheers and claps for OCTAVIA's greeting.)
OCTAVIA - SkeeeeeeWeeeeeeeee!
(OCTAVIA squats back down next to APRIL.)
APRIL - Girl, your greeting cracks me up!
OCTAVIA - Yeah, it's funny huh?
APRIL - Hilarious!
IVIES - Greetings Big Sister April Shower!
Always dropping knowledge as we strive for pink and green!
Making sure these ivies know...
(IVY JUNE stops greeting. The crowd notices her mistake and makes noise.)
STUDENT - Oh shit, don't fuck up now! Ha ha ha!
APRIL - Aww see, how she gonna mess my greeting up?
OCTAVIA - Come on spec!
(IVY PRESJINA and IVY KATRICE continue. IVY KATRICE looks over at IVY JUNE.)
...what those precious letters mean!
As peacful and tranquil as the beauty of spring!
(IVY JUNE joins back in.)
IVIES - Don't let these ivies mess up because the pain she will bring!
April Shower fall down on me! April Shower fall down on me!
So this ivy may grow and be just like thee!
OCTAVIA - SkeeeeWeeee!
APRIL - Whatever!
IVIES - Greetings most gracious, vivacious, tenacious, poised, intellectual, sophisticated, divine, fine as wine, potential big sisters of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority Incorporated!
You are often imitated but never duplicated!
We bow for our ignorance and stand and respect your effervescent elegance!
We are honored to meet thee and greet thee!
Many have tried but the chosen are few, potential big sisters can we grow up to be just like you?
MAX, SYLVIA, GINA - SkeeeeeWeeeee!
MAX - Picture time.
(The Sorors begin to pose in front of the line and the crowd begins to take pictures. Then there is a loud call from across the yard.)
NINO - A Phi!
(The crowd turns around and sees the Alphas coming onto the yard with their line of three.)
SPHINXMEN singing - We are the Sphinxmen...and we're moooooving on slowly...cuz we're pleeedddggging Alpha...and we're bad mother...shut your mouth! See those frats, I know you do! Don't wanna be no Omega, Kappa, Sigma fool! Come together! Come together! Pledging Alpha! Pledging Alpha! On our way! Yeah on our way! We are the Sphinxmen...and we're moooooving on slowly...
MAX - Right on time. Here come the Bros.
GINA - Do they always come out right after Sorors?
MAX - Yeah, they wait behind the library until Sorors are done and then they march their boys out. It's like clockwork every year.
(The crowd flocks over to see the Alpha line as they march toward their plot. A few remain to take pictures of the AKA line and to congratulate the Sorors.)
STUDENT - Why aren't they in height order? The second one is taller than the third one?
STUDENT - I don't know, maybe they had an add on or something.
SPHINXMAN - ...Come together! Pledging Alpha! Pledging Alpha! On our way! Yeah on our way!
(They stop the song and stand in an intense stance with their faces contorted.)
REGGIE - Sphinxmen!
SPHINXMEN - Yes Dean!
REGGIE - Yall ready to kick this?
SPHINXMEN - Yes Dean!
REGGIE - Are yall sure?
SPHINXMEN JASON - Hell yeah Dean!
(The crowd cheers for JASON.)
REGGIE - Aight then, hook my shit up.
(The SPHINXMEN greet to the tune 'Do It Again' by Jay-Z)
SPHINXMEN - Twelve a m we had to get in the cut!
One a m the wood hit my butt!
Two a m we was greetin' the bros!
Three a m we was washin' their clothes!
Four a m at the Alpha house!
Five a m we had cleaned it out!
Six a m bros was hazing about!
Six fifteen bros was kicking us out!
Seven a m we couldn't call our friends!
Cuz twelve a m we gonna do it again!
We gonna...we gonna...we gonna do it again!
Greetings Dean Hermakis!
Who be shootin' wisdom at us!
Our protector and savior by day and by night!
Lead us through this darkness, to Alpha's shining light!
And even though this period is diligant and long!
We pledge to ever give you praise and always be strong!
Because we know that if we don't we will feel the wrath!
And the fire and the brimstone of your deadly grasp!
Our most noble Dean Hermakis, sage of ancient years!
We call upon your wisdom, to save us from our fears!
Help us cross those burning sands!
And make it into Alpha land!
We'll always hold the banner high!
And always give the battle cry!
A Phi till the day we die!
(The crowd cheers. Cameras go off.)
BOBBY - Oh Six! Do that shit boys!
TREY - A Phi!
BROTHERS - Oh Six!
SPHINXMEN - Greetings Mr. President, alias Cool Breeze!
BOBBY - You boys been chillin?
SPHINXMEN - Man please!
Just pledging hard and being crisp!
BOBBY - I heard yall was talking to some babes?
SPHINXMEN - Huh? Don't we wish!
That true Alpha man, whose blood is black and gold!
You'll never see him sweat because he's too cold too cold!
But when time came for pledging, Mr. President came with it!
He's the leader of the chapter and a thorough Sphinxman critic!
If something was accomplished, Mr. President probably did it!
And if your girl is a cutie, Mr. President probably hit it!
And if you are a hater, he will bring you to your knees!
Greetings Mr. President alias Coooooooooool Breeze!
BOBBY - Yeah boys! Oh Six!
BROTHERS - A Phi!
(RONNIE is in the crowd and looks at BOBBY who glances back at him. RONNIE turns and talks to the person standing next to him.)
SPHINXMEN - Greetings Big Brother Frostbite So Cold It Hurts!
To that brother of the black and gold!
Freezing cold! As the story is told!
So cold, so cold, so cold it hurts!
Chillin' on the yard in Alpha shirts!
Ask that brother how cold can he go!
You'll be shocked to know! Down to seven below!
What lesson did we learn from a brother so cold?
We are the masters of our fate! We are the captains of our soul!
TREY - Oh Six! I love my shit, short and sweet!
SPHINXMEN - Greetings Big Brother Bout It Bout It from the Bayou!
(The crowd laughs and hollers.)
STUDENT - Yeah Nino, with that New Orleans flava kid!
(NINO smiles back at the student.)
NINO - What yall niggas know about that dirty south huh?
(The crowd laughs. The SPHINXMEN greet to the tune of 'Back that Ass Up' by Juvenile.)
SPHINXMEN - Big Brother's swing is good!
I had to back my ass up!
Cuz he swung that wood!
I had to back my ass up!
(The crowd laughs hysterically.)
SPHINXMAN LARRY - Remix!
(The SPHINXMEN greet to the tune of 'Bling Bling' by the Hot Boys.)
SPHINXMEN - Swing! Swing!
Everytime he comes around the line...
Swing! Swing!
He always brings that oak and that pine...
Swing! Swing!
I ask and I pray every night...
Swing! Swing!
that you would guide us to that Alpha light!
SPHINXMAN LARRY - Remix!
(The SPHINXMEN greet to the tune of 'The Hot Boys' by the Hot Boys.)
SPHINXMEN - What kind of boy wears Alpha on his chest?
What kind of boy be crazy doin' dem steps?
What kind of boy represents that dirty south?
Throwing signs up in the air, screaming A Phi out his mouth?
Big Brother...Bout It Bout It...from the Bayou!
Big Brother...Bout It Bout It...from the Bayou!
SPHINXMAN LARRY - Remix!
(The SPHINXMAN greet to the tune of 'Ha' by Juvenile.)
SPHINXMEN - What you gonna do when dem Alphas after you?
You better run sphinxmen run sphinxmen run!
(The SPHINXMEN begin to jog in place. The crowd laughs.)
SPHINXMEN - And what you gonna do when the bros be comin' through?
You better run sphinxmen run sphinxmen run!
Run sphinxmen run sphinxmen run!
Run sphinxmen run sphinxmen run!
(The SPHINXMEN stop. The crowd cheers loudly and claps.)
NINO - A Phi!
BROTHERS - Oh Six!
DONTE - They better not fuck my shit up! Ya heard me! ...hook up that ol' school greeting!
SPHINXMEN - Greetings Big Brother Ezah!..alias From Back in the Dayz, When it was Cool to Haze!

Greetings Ezah, Nefer Tmu',

the most noble brother from the ooold school!

The Tribal Drum with a Rhythm from the past...

pledging Alpha hard so tradition might last!

The 10th Pharoah of the Egyptian clan.....

SPHINXMAN LARRY (posing) - an artist!

SPHINXMAN JASON (posing)- a creator!

SPHINXMAN QUINTON (posing)- an ebony man!

SPHINXMEN - Greetings Big Brother Haze Sinister,

greetings Big Brother Madd Hazer,

greetings Big Brother Haze into the AM...

BOBBY (thinks) - Damn this nigga done had madd big brother names!

SPHINXMEN - Greetings Big Brother Ten Waze to Haze,

greetings Big Brother Hazeology,

greetings Big Brother MetamorphaHAZE,

greetings Big Brother Haze Express, No Local Stops.....

greetings Big Brother Razed to Haze,

GREETINGS, MOST NOBLE LORD, OF THE UPPER HOUSE...

OF ALPHA PHI ALPHA FRATERNITY.....

(leaning back) IIINNNNCORPORATED!!!!

DONTE - YYYEEESSSSSSSSS!!!!......YES!.......I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!

(The crowd laughs.)

SPHINXMEN - Greetings Big Brother Osiris alias Ape Tamer!
SPHINXMAN QUENTON - I knew this bad Alpha man he was...
SPHINXMEN - Whoa!
SPHINXMAN QUENTON - I heard he crossed those hot burning sands I mean...
(The crowd joins in.)
SPHINXMEN and CROWD - Whoa!
SPHINXMAN QUENTON - He travels with that oak and that pine I'm sayin'...
SPHINXMEN and CROWD - Whoa!
SPHINXMAN QUENTON - He spits at the honies looking fine like...
SPHINXMAN and CROWD - Whoa!
(Confusion arises in the crowd and everyone's attention focuses on a policeman who is making his way forcefully through. REGGIE turns around to see what the comotion is about and he instructs the SPHINXMEN to stop.)
OFFICER - Who is in charge here?
BOBBY thinks - What the fuck is this shit about?
REGGIE - Is there a problem officer?
BOBBY - Yeah, what's going on?
OFFICER - I am here to take a student named Jason in for questioning on assault charges. I was told I could find him here.